Show No Fear by Krystal Mcllree

show no fear

Fall Flash Fiction Contest Winner story #1!  Congratulations, Krystal Mcllree (8th grader at Thomas Jefferson Middle School in Port Washington, WI)!  

Show No Fear

By: Krystal McIlree

       The wind on October 31 was brisk and chilly. It was Halloween after all. Everything was supposed to be dark and chilly. On this day, the wind decided to abruptly open my window. This would probably scare almost anyone, but not me. I was definitely not an easily scared person. I always get bored during horror movies, and whenever someone jumped out at me I punched them for the fun of it. Hey, don’t judge, it’s a good excuse to punch someone. I put down my paintbrush and walked over to close it. It was really hard to close, so I had to slam it and lock it.

       “Maggie! What was that?!” My mom yelled from downstairs. Oh yeah, I forget to say my name. It’s Maggie Natalie Smith. I was named after an award winning actress, of which plays a role in a show Downton Abbey. My mom is obsessed with that show. I personally don’t like it. Don’t worry, my last name was originally Smith.

       “It was just the window!” I yelled back and went back to painting a pumpkin. It was quite a masterpiece as my mom would say. It was only 4:00 and already trick or treaters were constantly ringing our doorbell. I tried to focus on my painting. All of a sudden, the ringer on my phone blared, but it is muffled under my comforter. I ran to it, knowing my friends would spam me with texts if I was a little late in answering. The first text was from Bree.

       Hey so do you guys want 2 go 2 the haunted house on Jefferson Street tonight?

       How about no. That house is supposed to be haunted. Idk how Jake and Jack got it for their annual haunted house. My other friend Chuck said. Even though boys are supposed to be “a man” Chuck was definitely the scaredy cat of the group.

       Don’t be a wuss, Chuck. I say let’s go. It sounds awesome! Ryder was definitely the most adventurous.

       Do I have to??? I reply, really not wanting to go.

       They all reply the same thing, even Chuck. YES!

       Ugh fine.

       They all decided to meet at my house at 8:00, so I had plenty of time to finish my pumpkin. By the time I finished with the very detailed face of my pumpkin, it was 7:50. I quickly changed into a tee shirt and ripped jeans, and slipped on my converse. I combed through my hair with my fingers so it looked somewhat decent. I flew down the stairs and flew back up when my mom told me I needed a sweatshirt. The last time I went down the stairs I felt hands on my back pushing me causing me to nearly fall face first, but I caught myself with the rail. I turned to face whoever did it, but no one was there. That was weird, I thought. Just then the doorbell rang for the millionth time.

       I went to the door, for I was expecting my friends. However, it was a women dressed as a young girl, and her daughter was dressed like a life sized doll. “Cute costumes,” I said, plopped some candy in her bag, and shut the door.

       The doorbell rang again. “Look, your costumes aren’t that scar-” My friends stared at me funny. “Oh, hey guys. Mom! I’m leaving!” I yelled and shut the door.

       The house was not far from mine, but still a long walk. When we got there Jake and Jack were standing on either side of the door, probably collecting cash before the people could even get inside the stupid place. Of course I have to be first, and Ryder is last. I opened the cold, rusty, metal gate, and we walked on the uneven sidewalk to the worn down house. The first step creaked under my foot, and a pattern continued with more creaks. When we reached the top, I turned to Jack, the friendlier of the Jamison twins. I saw something strange. The twins are known for their mischievous bright blue eyes, but today Jack’s eyes were dark, almost black.

       “How much?” I asked.

       “No price. Just go on in and explore around a little.” He gave me a creepy smile, and I laughed.

       “Nice colored contacts, Bud.” I said and walked into the house. What I found was truly strange. Nothing. No giant spider webs, no men with chainsaws, no creepy clowns. Nothing but a couch, coffee table, and a television. It was just like any other ordinary house. I turned toward the door ready to leave this awful excuse of a haunted house. The door slammed shut. Ryder tried to open it but he couldn’t.

       “It’s locked,” he said, his voice quavering.

       “Come on, Guys, this is obviously part of the haunted house,” I said, shaking my head at their cluelessness.

       “Yeah, duh.” Bree said, but even her voice was shaky.

       “Let’s head to the basement, I’m sure it will be more scary down there…” I said creepily to freak my friends out, and before they could disagree I tried to find where it would be. When I found it, I opened the door and flipped the switch. Some dim lights lit the narrow wooden stairs. I stepped down and my friends followed. I crept further and further down the steps which seemed to lead on forever. I could feel Chuck’s shaky breath on my neck.

       “Hey, Maggie?”  Bree breathed in sharply. “I just realized something.”


       “There is no one else here.”

       I stopped and almost as suddenly the lights flickered off. The lights flickered back on two seconds later. Bree screamed, and I turned to see what had happened. What I expected to see was Chuck cowering from her scream, but he wasn’t there. There was no trace of him. The sides of the stairs were both cement walls, and the wood boards were strong. I had to admit I was a tiny bit scared. Bree looked almost in tears, and I couldn’t blame her. Ryder, also, seemed very, very scared.

       “Let’s just go back upstairs, he has to be in on it,” I said, trying to comfort my friends. They both nodded and Ryder led us back to the kitchen, of which the entrance to the basement was. I was surprised the door opened, thinking that would be scarier. I mean, for other people. Not me of course.

       “Hey, what’s this?” Ryder said walking over to the corner of the kitchen. He walked toward a corner cabinet with green slime coming out. He opened the cabinet, and we discovered the stuff was rubber.

       “This is seriously the best they could do?” The lights went out again, and again almost two seconds later, they flickered back on. Ryder was gone. Again no trace, and no sign of where he could have crept out. Bree and I were both behind him, so we basically had him cornered. On the inside I freaked. Bree screamed again, the lights went out yet again. Bree’s scream was cut off and when the lights came back on, she was gone.

       I screamed and ran, running through the hall. I have such a bad memory, I couldn’t remember where the front door was. This house is haunted, I kept saying in my head. The lights went out, and I finally found the front hallway that led to the front door. The moonlight that shone through the small window in the door gave me a bit of relief. I ran as fast as I could to the front door and burst through, only to find Jake snap a picture, and Jack laughing his butt off. I skidded to a stop as the camera flashed in my face. I heard laughter from behind me, and I turned to find my three friends, all completely fine.

       “We did it! We actually scared Maggie Smith!”


I hope you enjoyed this Flash Fiction story by one of the eighth graders at Thomas Jefferson Middle School in Port Washington, WI!  Keep checking back each Friday for more stories by more awesome students! 


10 thoughts on “Show No Fear by Krystal Mcllree

  1. Utterly brilliant! What an atmospheric story. I didn’t see the twist coming so ten out of ten for keeping me hooked until the bitter end. Congratulations, Krystal. I look forward to seeing your horror books on Amazon in the future 🙂

  2. Reblogged this on Shelley Wilson and commented:
    I had to share this winning story by 8th Grade Student, Krystal Mcllree, from Thomas Jefferson Middle School in Port Washington.

    Sara visited this school and set the students a flash fiction challenge. Krystal’s winning entry is brilliant.

  3. Love your story, Krystal! Flash fiction can be one of the hardest types of writing to do but your story flowed effortlessly. Very atmospheric and great job at building suspense. Keep on writing, and we look forward to reading more of your work. Happy Halloween!

  4. I very much enjoyed this story. It was creepy and cool at the same time. I have to admit, I’d probably be running, screaming from the house too if I were Maggie. Keep writing. With more flexibility and freedom with what you can write, I believe you will go far. Loved this story.

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